My final project consists of four poems, based on my own personal experiences. These poems were written under the framework of the Christianity, primarily discussing the God of the Baptist denomination that I was raised under. There is also a reference to the Catholic experience, as shared by my friends and our shared experiences regarding sex and religion. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
The inspiration for this project stems from songs that utilize religious undertones, often subverting the name of God as a metaphor for a sexual partner (specifically one of a casual nature). For example, Juno Levi’s \u201cI had gay sex with god (it could\u2019ve gone better)\u201d includes lines such as \u201cI spent all of last night in god\u2019s bed\u2026Second coming in a bathroom stall, but now God won\u2019t return my calls.\u201d Ryan Beatty\u2019s song \u201cGod in Jeans\u201d includes lyrics of this same nature, \u201cGod is real, he was sleeping in my bed last night, we were naked with the radio on.\u201d\u00a0 The songs included within the Spotify playlist (linked below) provide specific reference to more examples of the type of content that sparked my interest in the idea of using God as a metaphor for a sexual partner. On another level, I also noted that many of these songs also use a reference to God (as a metaphor or to the literal figure) to explore the personal vices of women in particular and an examination of their own relationship with religion. But why use God\u2019s name at all? In the article \u201cNot Pretty Girls?: Sexuality, Spirituality, and Gender Construction in Women’s Rock Music,\u201d Kate McCarthy notes that there is an \u201cinteresting array of women\u2019s music that brings ancient religious concepts into conversation with contemporary feminism about the meaning of embodied life.\u201d McCarthy notes that it is Christianity in particular spurning the conversation in music regarding the female body, sex, and spirituality.\u00a0<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Over the course of the project, I found myself struggling to reconcile my own thoughts on sex and religion with the complexity of both of these practices under the thumb of the patriarchy. As a result, each poem follows the evolution of my sexuality from the myth of virginity to the lingering feelings of shame associated with the complicated nature of sex, religion, and the patriarchy.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Forgive me God <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Blessed are the pure in heart, <\/p>\n\n\n\n For they will see God<\/p>\n\n\n\n Quiet then violent<\/p>\n\n\n\n These verses echo <\/p>\n\n\n\n Forgive me God for I have sinned <\/p>\n\n\n\n Stained the bed sheets crimson <\/p>\n\n\n\n Virginal purity lost <\/p>\n\n\n\n 32 seconds <\/p>\n\n\n\n A condom wrapper on the floor <\/p>\n\n\n\n Bare skin on bare skin<\/p>\n\n\n\n An unholy lust <\/p>\n\n\n\n I\u2019m impure <\/p>\n\n\n\n Religion mocks me- affirms that I\u2019m a whore <\/p>\n\n\n\n But if You laid down next to me, <\/p>\n\n\n\n Would You say the same? <\/p>\n\n\n\n Condemn me to an eternal fire <\/p>\n\n\n\n Banish me from heaven\u2019s gates <\/p>\n\n\n\n Hold up your golden picket sign:<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cRun from sexual sin!\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cFlee fornication or burn in Hell!\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n Make your judgments <\/p>\n\n\n\n Compel me to repent, repent, repent!<\/p>\n\n\n\n Forgive me God for I have sinned <\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n\n\n\n Oh God-<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Oh God, Oh God, Oh God<\/p>\n\n\n\n That\u2019s what You wanted to hear, isn’t it? <\/p>\n\n\n\n Me calling Your name <\/p>\n\n\n\n Kneel before you<\/p>\n\n\n\n Down on both knees in a silent prayer <\/p>\n\n\n\n Oh yes God, <\/p>\n\n\n\n Leave bruises on my neck <\/p>\n\n\n\n Taste the open sea between your lips<\/p>\n\n\n\n Bring me to salvation <\/p>\n\n\n\n My soul thirsts for you<\/p>\n\n\n\n My flesh faints for you<\/p>\n\n\n\n Oh yes God, <\/p>\n\n\n\n Underneath you I\u2019m perfect<\/p>\n\n\n\n I\u2019m your other half <\/p>\n\n\n\n Made for you and only you in every way<\/p>\n\n\n\n But if I enjoy it too much<\/p>\n\n\n\n I\u2019m your Eve, your temptress<\/p>\n\n\n\n Mother of the femme fatale <\/p>\n\n\n\n Fall from Eden <\/p>\n\n\n\n I took your forbidden bite <\/p>\n\n\n\n So cast me out of your bed, your paradise <\/p>\n\n\n\n But only after this<\/p>\n\n\n\n Only after you have your fun<\/p>\n\n\n\n Only after you hear me call your name<\/p>\n\n\n\n I Met God At the Bar<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n I saw God across the bar<\/p>\n\n\n\n The light of His Glory in a single look<\/p>\n\n\n\n Nursing a whiskey sour with a divine indifference<\/p>\n\n\n\n Lord Almighty in a pair of slacks <\/p>\n\n\n\n Come closer He said <\/p>\n\n\n\n I want to know you He said <\/p>\n\n\n\n His fingertips smooth on my skin<\/p>\n\n\n\n His gentle whispers in my ear <\/p>\n\n\n\n Whiskey breath lingers <\/p>\n\n\n\n His hands graze my thighs <\/p>\n\n\n\n Come closer He said <\/p>\n\n\n\n I want to know you He said <\/p>\n\n\n\n A few more sips of the blood of Christ <\/p>\n\n\n\n Communion to calm the nerves <\/p>\n\n\n\n Come closer He said <\/p>\n\n\n\n I want to know you He said <\/p>\n\n\n\n And God takes me to his bed <\/p>\n\n\n\n Lays me down<\/p>\n\n\n\n Caught up in a ecstasy of His revelation <\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n Nightly Prayer<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Now I lay me down to sleep<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n I pray the Lord my soul to keep <\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n May God guard me through the night<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n And wake me with the morning light<\/em><\/p>\n<\/div><\/div>\n\n\n\n But may I ask You why I must feel shame?<\/p>\n\n\n\n The hurtful guilt claimed to be in Your name?<\/p>\n\n\n\n Your Baptist Church denies sexual liberations<\/p>\n\n\n\n Its patriarchal force to condemn any other deviations<\/p>\n\n\n\n So I turn away from Your sacred doors<\/p>\n\n\n\n Search to find myself outside of restrictive moors<\/p>\n\n\n\n New independence and sexual exploration beacon me <\/p>\n\n\n\n On a college campus, I can choose to be free <\/p>\n\n\n\n But instead Dear God, it\u2019s the very patriarchy that subverted You<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s the unyielding shame, choking its lies down my throat too<\/p>\n\n\n\n Give it time or give it up, you\u2019re a prude or you\u2019re a slut<\/p>\n\n\n\n It\u2019s the guilt inside that leaves the deepest cut<\/p>\n\n\n\n If I desire to have casual sex, is that wrong? <\/p>\n\n\n\n Hooking up with a stranger, it\u2019s just another man stringing you along<\/p>\n\n\n\n But it was my decision<\/p>\n\n\n\n Can become met with that feminist derision <\/p>\n\n\n\n Or maybe it wasn\u2019t my choice at all<\/p>\n\n\n\n Just a system designed to make women feel small<\/p>\n\n\n\n I was drunk that one night, so I\u2019m the one to blame<\/p>\n\n\n\n Well the girl\u2019s a whore, what a shame!<\/p>\n\n\n\n So can I not just enjoy sex?<\/p>\n\n\n\n When being a woman has made it so complex<\/p>\n\n\n\n Dear God, I ask of You<\/p>\n\n\n\n To help me believe that it isn\u2019t true<\/p>\n\n\n\n To make all of the awful feelings inside <\/p>\n\n\n\n And all the nights that I cried<\/p>\n\n\n\n Go away as easy as they came<\/p>\n\n\n\n For it hurts to live everyday in shame<\/p>\n\n\n\n And I truly hope it isn\u2019t You to blame<\/p>\n\n\n\n Amen<\/p>\n\n\n\n Spotify link<\/strong>: https:\/\/open.spotify.com\/playlist\/4dnvV6ebycAXeg7VTtmj0C?si=DfLlpdo5RY-KYYe3TdEMgA<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n Bible Verses: <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n “Blessed are the pure in heart, For they will see God” (Matthew 5:8)<\/p>\n\n\n\n “Run from sexual sin” (1 Corinthians 6:18)<\/p>\n\n\n\n “Flee fornication” (1 Corinthians 6:18)<\/p>\n\n\n\n “My soul thirsts for you; my flesh faints for you” (Psalm 63)<\/p>\n\n\n\n References:<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n Beste, Jennifer. “Jesus at a college party”, Christian Century, <\/em>February 13, 2019. <\/p>\n\n\n\n Bogle, Kathleen A. Hooking up Sex, Dating, and Relationships on Campus \/ Kathleen A. Bogle.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n New York: New York University Press, 2008.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Freitas, Donna. Sex and the Soul : Juggling Sexuality, Spirituality, Romance, and Religion on America\u2019s College Campuses \/ Donna Freitas. <\/em> <\/p>\n\n\n\n Updated edition. New York, New York: Oxford University Press, 2015.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Higgins, Jean M. \u201cThe Myth of Eve: The Temptress.\u201d Journal of the American Academy of Religion<\/em> 44, no. 4 (1976): 639\u201347.<\/p>\n\n\n\n http:\/\/www.jstor.org\/stable\/1463485<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Kornhaber, Spencer. \u201cA New Generation of Pop Stars Are Dancing with The Devil.\u201d The Atlantic<\/em>, September 16, 2022,<\/p>\n\n\n\n https:\/\/www.theatlantic.com\/culture\/archive\/2022\/09\/rina-sawayama-new-album-hold-the<\/a>-girl-review\/671442\/<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n McCarthy, Kate. “Not Pretty Girls? Sexuality, Spirituality, and Gender Construction in Women’s Rock Music,” The Journal of Popular Culture<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n 39, no. 1 (2006): 69-94. <\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n\n\n\n <\/p>\n<\/div>\n<\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" My final project consists of four poems, based on my own personal experiences. These poems were written under the framework of the Christianity, primarily discussing the God of the Baptist denomination that I was raised under. There is also a reference to the Catholic experience, as shared by my friends and our shared experiences regarding […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":87,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[25,58],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1356","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-christianity","category-hook-up-culture"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/dyarbrough.digitalscholar.rochester.edu\/relc189gsws189\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1356","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/dyarbrough.digitalscholar.rochester.edu\/relc189gsws189\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/dyarbrough.digitalscholar.rochester.edu\/relc189gsws189\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dyarbrough.digitalscholar.rochester.edu\/relc189gsws189\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/87"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dyarbrough.digitalscholar.rochester.edu\/relc189gsws189\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1356"}],"version-history":[{"count":12,"href":"https:\/\/dyarbrough.digitalscholar.rochester.edu\/relc189gsws189\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1356\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":1462,"href":"https:\/\/dyarbrough.digitalscholar.rochester.edu\/relc189gsws189\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1356\/revisions\/1462"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/dyarbrough.digitalscholar.rochester.edu\/relc189gsws189\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1356"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dyarbrough.digitalscholar.rochester.edu\/relc189gsws189\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1356"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/dyarbrough.digitalscholar.rochester.edu\/relc189gsws189\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1356"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}